into the hood
by ephelid
Summary: An evil hoodie, 26 dead people, Feitan wanted dead or alive, just because Chrollo wanted to be kind.


The Black Whale dining room was always quieter in the morning. And Feitan was the most quiet of all. He wasn't a morning person. Or an any-time person. Actually, with his scarf rolled up to his eyes, he hardly looked like a person at all, but he seemed to be even more sullen than usual. **  
**

"Something wrong, my Fei ?" asked Chrollo kindly, chewing their cereals.

Neither a look or a sound rewarded them. Feitan was fumbling through his pancakes with the tip of his knife.

"Not hungry ? You don't want pancakes ? You want my yoghurt instead ?" insisted Chrollo, pushing the pot to him. "It's vanilla."

Vanilla yoghurts were Chrollo's favorites, and they hoped this selfless act of pure love would cheer him up. It at least was good enough to induce a reaction : "I can't, I'm lactose intolerant" mumbled Feitan sipping his milk.

Chrollo glanced at their watch. Nope, it wasn't Feitan's periods day yet. Which could mean only one thing : he was in a huff with them.

They sighed. Their friend wasn't a communication master. Knowing him, they'd need three weeks of this treatment before they hear they stepped on his foot or something.

They attempted another approach : "The captain invites us to his table tonight. I wonder what I will wear" they pretended. "Can you come and chose my clothes with me ? You have such a good fashion sense." Where gluttony failed, flattery may succeed.

Feitan chewed on a pancake. Drank milk again. Spread jam on a slice of bread. Ate the slice of bread. Peeled an orange. Ate the orange. "K" he dropped after ten minutes. Chrollo would have wept in relief.

They went to Chrollo's cabin and they spreaded all their clothes on their bed. Although he may deny it, Feitan was a true fashion-victim and would be in a better mood after he'd deck them out.

But Feitan didn't even get a look at the bed. He was going through Chrollo's wardrobe. "You put this on" he said finally, holding his find.

It was a shapeless mass of black fabric Chrollo had never seen in their life. They took it. It was a cat-ears hoodie, with little pads at the end of the sleeves. "But Fei…"

Only his eyebrows were to be seen over his scarf, but they frowned visibly. "What. You no longer trust my fashion sense ?"

Chrollo grinned a smile. "Of course I do. But what will I wear on bellow ?"

"You put this on."

"What ? I won't go around bare-ass in a hoodie at the captain's table !"

"You put. This. On."insisted Feitan, and Chrollo could guess amused tones in his voice. It was all that mattered. If it could please him…

Chrollo fully undressed and put the sweater on.

"Wear the hood" ordered Feitan, and Chrollo complied. They even had the grace to slip their fingers into the little pad gloves. "Meow" they said, knowing it was what Feitan expected.

They heard a strange noise. His ears turned on the hood. What was that ? Danger ? Prey ?

But it was just Feitan laughing under his mask. They knew they should feel happy about this, but they were also… disconcerted.

"Mrew ?"

The door suddenly bursted open, and Hisoka rushed into the room.

"Chrollo ! Why are you locked with Feitan ? And half naked ? And all cute ? You're cheating on me ?" he yelled.

Chrollo hissed and ran away on all fours under Hisoka's legs, with a surprising agility, even for them.

"I scared them ?" asked Hisoka with a sudden flash. "Their tail was tousle."

Feitan frowned. He couldn't remember any tail on the cloth when he found it.

Then he pursued Hisoka all around the floor to torture him because he was bored.

°o0o°o0o°o0o°o0o°o0o°o0o°

* * *

He gave up on his race at midday because he was hungry. He came back to the dining room and walked to a table. The dining passengers, seeing him coming, screamed in terror and scattered. Perfect. He grabbed the tablecloth, concentrated, and pulled sharply. The whole tableware broke on the floor in a terrible crash, which was exactly what he wanted to do. He sat and Phinks came over.

'The security is looking for you. They want you dead or something."

Feitan waited to see if Phinks was about to say something that mattered his interest, but he only sat next to him, leaving enough room for the massive shape of Franklin. "Hi Fei. There are posters of your face with "dead or alive" written on."

Feitan frowned. What were the guys doing today about small talks.

"It's your best profile" said Machi stealing a dish to a terrified waiter who ran away as soon as he saw Feitan. "Your scarf looks really good on the pictures."

Feitan mumbled in agreement. At least Machi said something interesting.

"But Shizuku took offense. If you didn't know what to do with the corpses, you should have asked her. She'd get rid of it. Six mutilated bodies piled up in a corridor, it's not very discreet. And right at your cabin door. Just like you didn't care."

This time, Feitan listened carefully. That was concerning. Damn. He didn't like Shizuku to be upset, she's cool.

°o0o°o0o°o0o°o0o°o0o°o0o°

* * *

His meal over, on his way back to his cabin, he came upon ten riot security guys, armed to the teeth, while ten others were coming from behind. "Don't move ! You're accused of six homic…". Eighteen seconds later, he stepped across their dead bodies, and was about to miss the outlines on the floor. He had now six silhouettes in chalk as a doormat. There were a little blood left. He shrugged and stepped on it.

The first thing he saw when he opened the door was the long cat tail poking out of under his bed.

"You're badly hidden, Chrollo."

Two narrows pupils glowed in the dark, and a pair of moustaches quivered. "Mrew ?"

Feitan crouched down slowly : "Kitty kitty… come and see daddy…" Damn, he should have bring some milk.

Chrollo crawled out carefully, and suddenly squatted. A move of an agonising security officer caught their attention. Their pupils widened, they hissed angrily and they ran away in the corridor.

Feitan sighed. Away they're gone again, doing who knew what. He should do something.

A nap looked like a good idea.

°o0o°o0o°o0o°o0o°o0o°o0o°

* * *

He woke up to a whine and scratching noises at his cabin door. He opened to the groaning and severely damaged body of Hisoka, and Chrollo squatting next to him, licking their paw and brushing their ears. They glanced at him with disdain and then ostensibly turned their back.

"Ho, what a beautiful gift" said Feitan with a forced cheerful voice. "Even better than the six previous ones."

On the hood, an ear pivoted in his direction.

"I chased down this prey all morning long. It's exactly what I wanted."

Chrollo suspended their wash and turned their muzzle to him : "Mrew ?"

"And a gift is always so much better. I killed the twenty people that a potential whiteness under my bed could have seen in the corridor. They weren't gifts. I'd never accept anything but from Chrollo. No need for anyone here to get jealous and run away again.

"Nyyyya !"

Chrollo walked slowly to him, purring softly, rubbing their face to Feitan's thigh. He scratched them under their chin.

"Ho… cute…" moaned Hisoka. Feitan kicked him in the face before letting Chrollo get inside.

With a gracious leap, they jumped on the bed, pawing the curtain, purring excitedly. Feitan kicked again Hisoka who was trying to get in, and walked to Chrollo, who rolled upon their back, their paws against their chest, trilling some delighted "mwrrrew ?"

Feitan pat their head. "First of all, pulling off this hoodie…"

°o0o°o0o°o0o°o0o°o0o°o0o°

* * *

A few hours later, Chrollo woke up naked in Feitan's bed. Feitan was still asleep next to him, smiling in a nightmare. He was so cute. Maybe they could steal him a kiss…

"I know what you're thinking about. Stop that." said Feitan, still asleep.

Chrollo frowned. Feitan is a telepath when he sleeps ? Weird. Then they shrugged and thought about something else. "Why are they chalk draws ?" they said looking by the open door. Chrollo and Feitan thought that "modesty" meant "rash fashion" in french.

"You don't remember ?" said Feitan half-asleep. "You killed six people and mutilated Hisoka to please me."

"Sounds like me. But I can't remember a thing. One second I'm in my room choosing clothes, and the next I'm here with you stripping me."

This time Feitan woke up fully and glanced at them : "You mean you don't question anything when you teleport from a room to another, covered in blood, with me playing with your…

"… tail ? Not like I disagreed. I just kept up with what was going on."

Feitan rolled his eyes. "But why did you need to be so dramatic ? So kind and all ? If you want to spend the night with me, you just ask."

"You were so sullen ! So grumpy ! I just wanted to cheer you up !"

" I wasn't. And how could you tell anyway. Nobody can see my face under my scarf."

Chrollo untangled Feitan's scarf off their dick and looked at it : "Is it a new one ?'"

"Yep. The skull is frowning. So much more badass."

Chrollo thought about a second. "Now that you mention it, you never said or did anything unusual today. I must have been mislead by this scarf expression."

Chrollo huddled against Feitan, reassured, and felt asleep again. Feitan looked at them, then at the hoodie rolled in a ball at the bed foot. He knew they had to get rid of the thing, but on the other hand… Chrollo was so cute with it…

Just to know, he softly rubbed Chrollo chin. Chrollo stretched their neck and purred gently.

Feitan smiled. Ok, he decided, while falling asleep again. They'd get rid of this.

°o0o°o0o°o0o°o0o°o0o°o0o°

* * *

 _epilogue_

Because Hisoka wasn't the guy who would miss anything of what was happening in the room that night, he was still lying on the doorstep in the morning. Too weak to defend, Feitan and Chrollo caught him easily. Feitan's decision hadn't flinched, but first, they had a nice laugh with Hisoka and a laser pointer.


End file.
